45. Happy Reunion

On February 8, 2002, father started to have breathing difficulties and the home sent him to the hospital for emergency treatment. He was given a ventilator to help him breathe. Although he was semi-conscious, he was aware that all his loved ones had gathered around to see him for the last time. When asked what he was doing, he told us with a smile on his face that he and mother were on a world tour on board a big ship.

The next day, his condition did not improved. We knew how dearly he wanted to be with mother again, and we decided not to delay his departure from this world no matter how much we would miss him. No sooner had Suit Meng signed the consent forms to discontinue the support system, and stepped into the room, father took a deep breath and slowly released it, sort of like a sigh of relief as if to signal his approval, and breathed his last breath.

He was very calm and peaceful even at the very last moment, and had on a happy and serene face when he passed away at exactly 10.30 p.m. on February 10, 2002 - the night before the eve of Chinese New Year. He was 87. He used to jokingly tell us, patting his heart, that this "old engine is worn out and will give way one day", and it did as the doctor reported his death as cardiac failure.

As the hospital attendant wheeled our late father's body to the mortuary, three of his grandsons - Tony, Joseph and Chin Leon - and myself followed close behind like guards of honour. We wanted to make sure that his body was sent to the morgue safely.

The next morning, the eve of Chinese New Year, father's coffin was taken to the Prestavest Memorial Park near Taman Semerak in Pokok Assam. Father had always wanted a quiet affair with only close relatives and friends in attendance, and his wish was fulfilled. It was almost noon when his coffin was placed at the crematorium. His was the last service of the day. After that, the facility closed for five days for the new year celebrations.

On the morning of February 15, we collected his ashes from Prestavest, and his urn was interned besides mother's at the Buddhist temple, Wat Phodhiyaran, in Assam Kumbang. Also laid to rest at the same place were our grandparents Chang Ah Kee and Wong Sui Cheng, uncle Chang Keng San, granduncle Chan Ting Yang and his wives, great granduncle Chan Kau Sing, granduncle Yin Kau, and uncle Ah Choon and his wife.

Auntie Loke, father's last surving sister at  Wat Phodhiyaran, in Assam Kumbang

Wat Phodhiyaran, in Assam Kumbang

Wat Phodhiyaran, in Assam Kumbang

Our father Chung Chow will be best remembered for his total commitment and love for his family as a filial son, a caring brother, a devoted husband, and a loving father.

He took great care of his parents, brought up his siblings, and provided for his wife and children all by himself. He was a very hard-working man with very simple needs. He was also a very pleasant, tolerant and considerate man. He was very special to us - someone whom we loved very much, admired fondly, and felt very proud of.

Next: 46. The Final Legacy »

44. MI Home

Chung Chow

During the later half of 2001, his health began to deteriorate. His legs were failing him and he had difficulties walking around and needed a wheel-chair. It was father's decision to stay at the MI Home, a private old folks cum nursing home in Aulong New Village. He wanted it that way as there would be attendants around the clock to take care of his needs. The attendants were very helpful and attentive, and he was happy there.

He had a lot of visitors - his own children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, in-laws, relatives and friends, and he never felt lonely. Everyone of us visited him on a regular basis. Even See Kun and Gigi made a special trip home from Maryland, U.S. in August 2001 to be with him for the last time.

Next: 45. Happy Reunion »

43. After Mother's Death

House in Kampung Boyan

We were afraid that father would succumb to loneliness after mother had passed away. However, he was a very patient man and accepted that "these things just happened without reason". He would often say: "It is all fated." He was a very soft-spoken and pleasant man who never raised his voice to anyone. He was also very tolerant and considerate. Even when he was angry, he kept the frustrations to himself, and he seldom complain.

Chung Chow

After mother's death, father moved in with brother Chew Tai at 172, Lorong 18, Taman Sri Kota, Taiping. However, when brother Chew Tai decided to sell his house and move to his in-law's house in Tupai, father moved in with me at Taman Lake View.

He was a very simple man with very simple needs. In the mornings, he would sit in the porch, listen to the birds sing, read the Chinese newspaper, and watch the neighbours go by. He preferred home cooked dishes. Three meals a day was his standard fare, and no supper. He usually eat one bowl of rice, sometimes a little more if he was hungry, and he never over-eat. He used to say: "eating to three-quarter full is better than a full tummy". In the evenings, he would watch some TV programmes, and his favourites were documentaries, and go to bed around 10.30 p.m.

Next: 44. MI Home »