46. The Final Legacy

There are many valuable lessons we can learn from father Chung Chow: through his words, actions and fine example. He often talked about three family guidelines that were passed down from one of our ancestors Zeng Can who was a disciple of Confucius.

These guidelines or value ethics were built upon Confucius's early version of the Golden Rule: "What one does not wish for oneself, one ought not to do to anyone else; what one recognises as desirable for oneself, one ought to be willing to grant to others", and also Confucius's great emphasis on the importance of study.

These guidelines can help us live in harmony and be successful. They are held in high regards because they honour our forefathers and are for the younger generations to follow.

The first guideline is to give a third thought before one speak or act. One should not only think twice but thrice about the consequences of one's words or actions. One should not make decisions in haste without much thought, but to carefully and patiently think through its implications. It has similar connotation as the English phrase "look before you leap".

The second guideline is to fulfill one's responsibilities towards others. This is based on the values of integrity, honesty, trust, truthfulness, and sincerity. The example given by father is about one's responsibility to fulfill a promise, in this instance to repay money owed. If one promises to do so on a certain date, then one must do it.

The third guideline is to be diligent and excel in one's work and study. No matter what one's profession or livelihood is, one must work hard and do one's very best. If we can follow and practise these three guidelines daily, we will achieve harmony within ourselves and with others, and be successful in all the things we do.

Potluck Lunch at Trudy's Place